A Kiss Is Just A Kiss..........

First-Grader Busted For Kiss.....Lexington, N.C......These days, a kiss isn't just a kiss - not even in the first grade. A 6-year old boy who kissed a girl on the cheek was suspended last week on the grounds of sexual harrassment. Jackie Prevette (the boy's mother) said the school overreacted to an innocent peck on the cheek by banishing her son, Johnathan, to a room apart from his classmates. Johnathan said the girl asked him to kiss her and that he was expressing friendship, according to his mother. "Can't you just imagine children skipping down the hall holding hands? Isn't that Norman Rockwell America?, Prevette said. District spokeswoman Jane Martin said the policy is clear: "A 6-year -old kissing another 6-year-old is inappropriate behavior. Unwelcome is unwelcome at any age." (Article from the Decatur Herald & Review News Service Reports.)

OPINION

First off, let me state for the record....this is an extremely sad day in America when an innocent kiss between children is now considered sexual harrassment. Let me also state, for the record, that I believe the school board handled this situation the wrong way. Having said that, I must also add......it's ashame it has come to this.....but realistically, due to the fact that women (and some men) encounter sexual harrassment from junior high on into and through adulthood....a stand like this had to have taken place sometime. A little harsh? Yeah. But so is the sexual harrassment women endure throughout their lives. It is my belief, and always has been (even as a little girl and didn't know anything about being politically correct) that children should be taught right from wrong as soon as they are old enough to understand. That's where parents fail miserably. Girls are taught (or were) to be little ladies, be polite, smile sweetly....and good things will come to them....and then "taught" to say no to sex until they are ready. However, the latter isn't drummed into them as much as the previous statement. Boys, on the other hand, are taught to be tough...take no for an answer, be assertive....and....girls don't really mean no when they say it. AND...if they are not taught that exactly, it is the implied message little boys receive while growing up. It is my belief that if boys and girls are taught at a very young age, what is acceptable behavior and what is not.....it will become learned behavior, and therefore become easier as they become older. Somewhere along the line we have to get across to youngsters, that kissing, touching and sexual comments are simply not acceptable in this society....in school or at work. By the time girls reach high school age, statistics prove they have been sexually harrassed many, many times over the years already! Somethings wrong somewhere. It's just common sense....or should be. We have got to start teaching our kids, so they become responsible and sensitve adults, that we are more than sexual beings....that sex between a man and a woman is something special and sacred...not something you want to share with just anybody. We have got to instill in them a sense of self-worth...that we simply are not placed on this earth to be thought of as sexual creatures.

As the mother of a young man, I have instilled in my son the importance of abstinence and respect. It is JUST as important for mothers (and fathers) to teach their SONS....as it is their DAUGHTERS. Maybe it's more important. Let's face it.....it's the women who are generally left to care for the children that come from such unions....not the men. At some point, we MUST teach our sons to be responsible for their actions. I remember, several years back, my son came to me concerned for a friend of his. Seems his friend was considering entering into a relationship with a young women who had been quite sexually active. My son, rightfully so, was concerned that his friend was putting himself in danger......of eventually dying of the Aids virus. My son was visibly upset with this. I comforted him. I advised him. I also told him I would be willing to talk to his friend and offer any advice deemed necessary. My son, thoughtfully, told me that he would love that. He also thanked me....for being one of few parents, kids could come to....talk to.....and trust. It has a happy ending.....my son told his friend that he could come to me...that I would listen....and help him if I could. My son's friend came to me. After much discussion and listening, this young man made the correct decision.......that could have very well have saved his life. What I want to know is.........why don't most kids feel they can come to their parents for loving advice? Where does a parent go wrong? I know that I have always been able to talk to my son......about anything. Has it been easy? Absolutely not! The bottom line is.....I instilled in my son, the trust every kid needs to be able to talk to his/her parents....without fear of repercussions. Do I have the perfect relationship with my son? Absolutely not....but I have what very few parents have with their kids.......and I started from the moment of birth......that's the key. We have got to stop stereotyping our children into roles of male and female. We have got to start teaching our little girls that they can do anything they want to do....that they are just as important in this world as little boys are. That they, alone, are responsible for what happens to them in life....good and bad. They are their own destiny...make choices wisely. We must instill in our sons.....a sense of responsibility for their own actions....and above all....to respect the opposite sex....girls are NOT put here for boys pleasure....

That being said, my heart cries for the 6-year-old....however, due to the excessive amount of sexual harrassment the average woman endures during her lifetime.....it's unfortunately, now become mandated that such actions be taken. What a sad state of affairs this has become. Why? Mostly because we, as parents of young men, don't stress enough to them the importance of respecting young girls.....and also the parents of young girls who do not stress enough to them the importance of self-respect and self-worth. What a crying shame!!!!!!

Note: Let me also state, that I believe the parents of the little girls who "asked" to be kissed....should also reap the repercussions of this, as well. Fair is fair. The parents of the little girl should also be taught to teach their child that the behavior she displayed was also unappropriate.

The truth of the matter is....this should be labeled "bad & inappropriate behavior" and should be dealt with on that level....kids that age truely do not understand "sexual" behavior. My beliefs are the same, but I do believe, after much thought....that it cannot be labeled sexual behavior.